#41 - Living the Life You DON'T Want

By Armaan Athwal

Today's Overview:

• Finding clarity through what you don’t want

• Exercise: Creating the anti-vision life

• Quote of the day

Knowing What to Avoid

It’s important to have a clear vision for what you want in life, a roadmap to guide your future. But have you ever considered the power of creating a vision that’s the exact opposite of what you want? That’s where the concept of "anti-vision" comes in.

I first came upon this idea from Dan Koe, and I have to say, it’s a game changer. The idea is simple yet profound; by identifying and visualizing what you absolutely don't want, you can create a more vivid picture of what you do want. This might sound a bit counterintuitive, but it’s like setting up a boundary to define your ideal path.

Here’s a video that really highlights this concept and drove the point home for me:

Vision is essentially having a mental picture of your desired future. Oppositely, the concept from the video presents a mental picture of the life you want to avoid.

Sometimes, you might find yourself in a tricky spot known as the “lost zone”—feeling stagnant, unsure of where you are, or what you want in life. I touched on this in my last article, emphasizing the importance of having direction to maintain momentum towards your goals and desired life.

But what if you’re unsure of which direction to take? Perhaps identifying which direction you definitely don’t want to go can provide the clarity you need. Sometimes, knowing what to avoid is just as valuable as knowing what to pursue.

Anti-Vision Blueprint

Having an anti-vision is often easier to create because many people subconsciously have preset boundaries they instinctively avoid. We know what we don’t want, even if we haven’t clearly articulated it.

We know what feels uncomfortable, what situations drain us, and what choices lead to dissatisfaction. By clearly defining these boundaries, you can use them as a tool to focus in on your vision of what you do want. It’s like setting up guardrails that keep you on track and prevent you from going off into unwanted territory.

Try this 👇:

Take some time to write down exactly the life you don’t want to live. Break it down into different time frames: daily, monthly, yearly, over the next decade, and for the rest of your life. Be specific—detail the situations, habits, and scenarios you want to avoid.

For example, on a daily basis, I don’t want to check my phone first thing in the morning. Over the next decade, I don’t want to find myself stuck in the same job without any progress. For the rest of my life, I don’t want to end up feeling sluggish, low on energy, and struggling with health problems.

Be creative with your anti-vision. List everything in life that you despise or hate. Let this exercise ignite a fire within you to avoid these scenarios. Think about specific things and their potential outcomes. Ask yourself if you would be okay living that way.

• Draw from the experiences of others. Maybe you have someone in mind whose life you definitely don’t want to mirror.

• Reflect on your past. Are there habits, events, or choices from your history that you want to avoid repeating? Identify what you want to prevent from happening again.

• Consider how your life might look if you continue with these habits and actions. Use this insight to guide yourself toward a more fulfilling and intentional future.

When you examine your anti-vision, it becomes clear what type of life you truly desire. This clarity helps you become more intentional in your choices, as you become more aware of where continuing negative habits might lead you.

Quote of the Day

“The amount of our endurance is directly proportionate to the clarity of our vision, so the practical application is we need to spend time to develop clarity of vision. What do you want your life to look like five, ten or fifteen years from now? Oftentimes, it's not so much a lack of discipline but a lack of vision.” - Rory Vaden

Similarly, understanding your anti-vision helps you avoid the life you don’t want and guides you more clearly toward the life you do want.